My Classic Tranquil Country Lakefront Destination Wedding

I just returned from an annual business trip at The Otesaga in Cooperstown, NY. On Saturday night a wedding was held in one of the ballrooms and it got me to thinking… here’s a way to solve the Jersey/NYC wedding location debate: choose neither and have a destination wedding to upstate New York!

Michael loves the idea of a getting married on an island, but we didn’t think it would work for many of our guests, so we didn’t really pursue it. However, this place is within driving distance, so I spent my working weekend viewing it from a bridal perspective.

The biggest draw is the setting. The hotel is situated on the base of beautiful Lake Otsego. No other buildings are in sight- just the glimmerglass lake surrounded by rolling hills densely covered in trees.

Located in the village of Cooperstown, NY, in the historic ‘Glimmer Glass’ section- a lovely little town. Nearby is both a farmer’s museum and another museum featuring the New York State Historical Society’s collections; an opera house and theatre festival; and the Empire State Carousel (housed in it’s own little Carousel House!), plus the cutest little sheep farm. And, of course, the Baseball Hall of Fame. The hotel, a Top 50 golf resort open since 1909, has tennis courts, a pool, and the top-rated Leatherstocking golf course. (God I sound like a catalogue!) Cooperstown is deep in the country- the rolling hills and farms of upstate New York.

The hotel itself is gorgeous and has a shabby chic vibe (without the shabby part). Each room has a painted chandelier and a view of either the great lawn or the lake. The food is great, it has multiple bars, and the staff is amazing. Maybe I’ve been in NYC too long, but I cannot get over how friendly everyone is!

They brought this to me for my birthday!

The ballrooms are grand but with a country feel to them- striped chairs, flower patterned curtains, lattice covered windows. It gives the stately mansion a cozy vibe.

Cocktail hour can be held in one of the club rooms but the best choice is on the veranda. There are two ballrooms, on one of which can be split into two smaller rooms or opened up to fit well over 200 people. Lodging includes meals- their breakfast buffet is legendary. Our dinner menus are always great- every year I come back from the trip a few pounds heavier!

And there’s also the option of a winter wedding- the resort is usually closed between Thanksgiving and March, but will reopen just for weddings in the colder months- so you have the entire place to yourself, plus I’m sure the rates would be a steal.

I like the idea of being somewhere completely ‘other’- it’s not the shore, it’s not the city. If we do the summer time, our sports loving guests will have lots of options, and I think everyone would enjoy the beautiful, tranquil setting. It is a good 4-5 hour drive, though, and the hotel rooms aren’t cheap (although I haven’t gotten the wedding discounted room rate yet), so the question is, is this too much to ask of our guests? It’s almost guaranteed that many people will not be able to make the trip.

This is for real!

One thing I can be sure of, they would be wonderful to work with, since I already know the whole staff well- they’re great people. The manager already started telling me about extras you can add, like a fire pit and a s’mores station (!!!). They can set up a tent out on the lawn, or croquet or bocce ball. Plus, decorating would be so fun- this is the kind of place you can do cute, crafty DIY projects for, or just pretty flowers. No high-falutin concepts needed!

Okay, this is just a thought, so don’t go freaking out if you’re probably going to be a wedding guest and hate the idea of travelling- this is a long shot. In the meantime, enjoy the view!

My Waterfront Clambake Summertime Super Beach-y Wedding

Michael and I have decided that if we get married in New Jersey, we’d like it to be in Asbury Park. We have several options we’re considering. I wrote recently about letting wedding stress get to me. At one point a couple weeks ago, I came across this idea, and spent the day putting together a great, laidback, casual-but-fun back up wedding plan. May I present…

The Beach Bar in Asbury Park

A couple years ago during Asbury Park’s revitalization, The Beach Bar opened on the deck of Convention Hall. This previously under utilized space was just begging for a bar like this- you absolutely cannot beat this location. You enter through Convention Hall or you can walk up the steps directly from the sand. The bar itself is indoors and has a row of seating there, but the draw, of course, is sitting directly above the sand and soaking in the million dollar ocean views.

And, the Beach Bar does weddings! You rent out the wings and choose a liquor package, then bring in a caterer. Rather than formal seating, you can utilize their fun lounge furniture for a great waterfront cocktail party vibe.

Really relaxed

Once you eliminate the standard ‘chicken or fish?’ seated dinner, you can get pretty creative with the food. With the lounge setting, a never-ending cocktail party would be a great option- a couple stations and passed hors d’oeuvres all night, with lots of great seafood options. My favorite idea was a clambake- I found a number of local caterers, including some very helpful people at Shore Catering and Lawrence Caterers, who do great lobster clambakes that can also be combined with BBQ packages for the ultimate beach party menu- think steamed clams, shrimp cocktail shooters and crab claws, burgers and barbeque chicken and whole steamed lobsters with drawn butter. Relaxed, fun and delicious.

And how easy would it be to decorate? This wedding demands a beach theme, and there are a lot of reasons beach themes are so popular- they’re fun, pretty and easy. Since the tables would vary in size and style, you wouldn’t need to coordinate large matching centerpieces. Just spread some shells and tea lights on the tables, and let the natural beauty of the ocean take center stage. The lights strung across the ceiling provide a romantic minimalism as well as light.

A cute sandcastle cake would fit perfectly.

Downsides- well, the inconsistency of weather. Temperatures at the beach are notoriously fickle- I would need to remind everyone to check the forecast for the shore and dress accordingly. Also, it’s an open air venue- if a storm rolled in, as my future mother-in-law quickly pointed out, rain + wind = wet guests. We saw this first hand last month!

 

Last, I’m still struggling with how ‘formal’ I want my wedding to be. I loooove the thought of this relaxed vibe; wearing a cute tea length dress, running down the steps barefoot directly onto the sand, slow dancing with my new husband while the waves crashed right in front of us. But there’s still a part of me that feels this is my only chance to ‘own’ a big old ballroom for the night and have a huge dance floor for getting down to Lady Gaga in a multi-thousand dollar dress. See, this is a side of me I’ve always struggled with- never wanting to miss an opportunity or my ‘only chance’. And I have to admit, I am getting a little caught up in the wedding world undertow- lately I feel the pull of BRIDE so strongly!

The Crystal Ballroom at the Berkeley Hotel

I always look for meaning or a connection in my venues- well, if you know me, you know I love the beach, and if you knew my mom, you know she really loved the beach. Our families love Asbury, and Michael and I both love the summertime.

So I have filed this under Plan B. Today, on this rainy, gray day, I’m going to comfort myself with visions of Michael and I, with rings on our fingers and our toes in the sand.

Venue Shopping- The Vineyard Edition

Wineries are popular spots for weddings. You’ve got the booze angle, beautiful flowering grounds, and a romantic, relaxed vibe. Now, New Jersey and New York City aren’t exactly known as wine regions- NYC is more famous for breweries and distilleries if anything, although NY State does have the Finger Lakes and parts of Long Island. And you may be surprised to learn that NJ actually has over 40 wineries.

I investigated three different venues, which I’ll share here:

Laurita Winery is in the western-most part of Monmouth County. The vineyard is lovely, and the space itself is striking- there’s a dining area, a cool bar and a loft for cocktails. The patio is also available in nice weather. They’re exclusive with one caterer, who has a variety of options. They serve their own wines exclusively, but also can bring in all other liquors.

Downsides- a little pricey; yet another location with a ‘no-shots’ policy (neither Mike and I are big shot takers, nor are the majority of my guests, but I hate the idea of being told ‘no’ to something like this when I’m shelling out tens of thousands of dollars!); and being out in ‘the country’, the hotels are limited and all a good 15+ minutes away. Not a big deal, but I’d prefer to give people closer options. (For us, too!)

Brooklyn Winery- yup, you read that right. They are the first winemaking center in Brooklyn. This place is very new and very cool. There are several options for renting, from one small room to the entire facility. Currently they do not have a hard liquor license, so you would buy one of their wine packages and bring in your own liquor- although by the time our wedding rolls around, that may have changed. You’d also bring in your own caterer- being a new place, they’re pretty flexible. The event coordinator is really sweet and I think I would love working with her.

Of course this place, being NYC, is a little expensive (for us) for what it is- the wine package, extra alcohol, and catering adds up quickly; but the space is so cool you wouldn’t need a ton of decorations. And it’s right in our own (sort of) neighborhood, Williamsburg. I love that.

Silver Decoy Winery, in Mercer county and less than 45 minutes form our hometowns, is a little smaller and doesn’t have a reception hall. Weddings are held under rented tents on the beautiful grounds. I believe they are open to several caterers- I found them through Falco’s Caterers, who also work with the Berkeley Hotel and many others.

I have to admit, this one has been on my mind for months- I just adore the picture with the luminaria walkway, and I loooove the idea of stringing paper lanterns across the ceiling, and decorating simply with vases of lavender. It looks so sweet and laidback and romantic. From the beginning I was hesitant to consider outdoor venues, because I didn’t want to spend the week before the wedding obsessively checking Weather.com. But when I imagine a rainstorm happening during our wedding, it doesn’t even faze me. Michael and I both love the rain (as long as we aren’t commuting in it!) and I think it could be kind of cool. Not my ideal situation, sure, but not a dealbreaker worst-case-scenario, at least.

So, this is definitely one of my ‘back up’ venues- if right now I’m investigating another location that I haven’t shared on the blog yet, and while I’m really excited about it, pulling it off would require a lot of work. So this is my ‘in case I lose my shit and realize I have no DIY skills, nor patience to deal with 10 different vendors’ Plan B.

Aren't the wineries so pretty? I'm hoping to head out for a tasting this spring. I promise to report back- after the buzz has worn off.

A New Direction – New York, NY

For the past 5 months, we’ve been looking exclusively at New Jersey venues- at least that’s what I’ve been telling you. When we got engaged, we figured we’d get married in Jersey since that’s where the bulk of our family is. Some of our friends are there too, and a lot of the people who would be travelling from other states have roots in NJ. Our instincts were to make it easier for everyone else, and also, we hoped, to save some money.

But over the last few months, we’ve realized several things- first, NJ aint exactly cheap itself. It’s not like we’re leaving New York City to hold the wedding in rural Arkansas. Also, the frequent trips back really drove home the fact that Brooklyn is our home now. After meeting with some fellow brides in January, I felt a little jealous that they were planning weddings in their own neighborhoods, getting to show distant friends and family their new homes. Some people have destination weddings, asking guests to travel thousands of miles to show them a place they love. We were doing the opposite and going to our guests. Is that a little backwards… ?

Anyway, the strongest emotion was a desire to get married in the place that means something to us- like the place we really consider our home. New York is where we first lived together as a couple. It’s where we got engaged. It’s where we first said ‘I love you’. Michael swears it wasn’t until he mentioned that he lived in Brooklyn that I became interested in him. And Brooklyn is where we plan to stay for the long haul. It makes sense to get married here.

Now, nothing’s official yet- and it has to become official soon, as most places start getting booked up at least a year in advance. Prime dates in May and June go the fastest, so we really need to pick a place and secure a date within the next month or so, tops. Luckily, I’ve been investigating NYC venues for awhile now. I’ve already been able to eliminate quite a few, based mainly on pricing- yeah, I said NJ isn’t cheap, but as everyone and their brother knows, NYC is really expensive. So here are a couple places I would’ve LOVED to have the wedding, if our budget was a little larger.

First: Stage 6 at Steiner Studios in the Brooklyn Navy Yards. Steiner Studios is one of the largest movie studios outside of California, and the Stage 6 building has amazing views of Manhattan. The venue is enclosed in glass and can be lit and decorated in so many ways. Abigail Kirsch is the exclusive caterer. Abigail Kirsch is a fantastic and pricey caterer who works in tons of the best NYC venues. I learned early on that if I see that name attached exclusively to something, I might as well cross it off the list immediately.

I liked the idea of this because the Navy Yards are so close to us- there’s a great Italian spot called Il Porto we like about a block away. Also, Michael works in the industry, to a degree, so there’s that connection. However, he didn’t warm up to the idea like I did, saying, “Why would I want to get married somewhere I might work one day?” Luckily, the expense made this a non-issue.

Smack Mellon in DUMBO, Brooklyn is a converted boiler building that now houses a fantastic non-profit arts organization that houses and curates exhibitions as well as offers studio space and educational programs. Nestled between the two bridges in DUMBO (Down Under the Manhattan Bridge Overpass), it’s another ‘raw’ space to which you pay a site fee and bring in your own caterer, rentals, etc.

My initial instincts were for art galleries or museums. And Smack Mellon does great things for the community. Their fee is certainly fair but, when combined with catering, still out of our range.

The Foundry in Long Island City, Queens, was in fact a steel foundry built in the 19th Century. It was restored about a decade ago and is absolutely beautiful. Fred Armisen and Elizabeth Moss got married there last year. You can have the wedding inside or out on the grounds, or do a combination. Some services are available from the owners but you do need to bring in your own caterer and rentals. The main space has a vaulted ceiling, exposed beams, two levels and lots of little alcoves.

All along, in any state, I’ve looked for a ‘connection’. Really, this place doesn’t have a big one for us, other than being the exact ambience we’re looking for as well as having a strong New York history. But it’s in Queens, and it’s not exactly cheap. Connections aside, it’s the cost that eliminated this for us. So unless an extra $15,000 drops into our laps, we’ll have to move on. But GOD it is gorgeous!

In the next couple of weeks I’ll be reporting back on several venues that are actual contenders (and probably a few more that we were priced out of but just want to share!) before we make our final decision. Again, I’m not saying that we’re definitely getting married in Brooklyn or that we’re even leaning towards it, just that it officially On The Table!